Happy Halloween, thank Goodness they took that penitential vigil out

Relax, KKK dogs will NOT be doing the unmentionable on your lawn. That was last night. Tonight it's ALL about the treats.

I went to Mass this morning. I noted that back in the 20s missal there was a vigil Mass with its own propers. Purple was worn and it was a day of semi-penitential fast. Change can be good! :-D At least kids now don't have to feel guilty about scarfing down all that stuff. I'm betting that even back then Halloween candy didn't break the fast - in the same way that calories from broken cookies don't count -- nor does anything consumed on the run.

These Dogs are on a Mission

I'd found this picture some time back on the internet, and it's just too good not to share it. I'm not sure quite what you'd give these guys. An Irish setter we had once grabbed an entire (uncooked) pot roast from the kitchen table when my mom's back was turned. My mom was torn between laughing and killing the dog. Our Heinz 57 loved anything you fed her, including tomatoes, but her favorite was turkey. And my springer spaniel loved anything that came from my hand. No chocolate for you guys. They look very serious. I expect if they showed up at Fr. Blake's, he might bless them and send them away with St. Francis medals.

Happy Halloween

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Even to the curmudgeons amongst you

Show of hands: How many of you buy the candy you'd most like to get stuck with? Let me know if it's less than 100%.

I first heard this poem in about 1969 or thereabouts. It's still good!

A DIET PRAYER
By Victor Buono in his book It Could Be Verse

Lord, My soul is ripped with riot
incited by my wicked diet.
"We Are What We Eat," said a wise old man!
and, Lord, if that's true, I'm a garbage can.

I want to rise on Judgment Day, that's plain!
but at my present weight, I'll need a crane.
So grant me strength, that I may not fall
into the clutches of cholesterol.

May my flesh with carrot-curls be dated,
that my soul may be poly unsaturated
And show me the light, that I may bear witness
to the President's Council on Physical Fitness.

And at oleomargarine I'll never mutter,
for the road to Hell is spread with butter.
And cream is cursed; and cake is awful;
and Satan is hiding in every waffle.

Mephistopheles lurks in provolone;
the Devil is in each slice of baloney,
Beelzebub is a chocolate drop,
and Lucifer is a lollipop.

Give me this day my daily slice
but, cut it thin and toast it twice.
I beg upon my dimpled knees,
deliver me from jujubees.

And when my days of trial are done,
and my war with malted milk is won,
Let me stand with Heavenly throng,
In a shining robe--size 30 long.

I can do it Lord, If You'll show to me,
the virtues of lettuce and celery.
If You'll teach me the evil of mayonnaise,
of pasta a la Milannaise
potatoes a la Lyonnaise
and crisp-fried chicken from the South.

Lord, if you love me, shut my mouth.

Fine Old Customs

It seems to me a certain party who gave a fine sermon last night, was all too familiar with the old custom of Halloween pranks. It was noted that in the past the "yuth" didn't receive the prepackaged treats given to children now. They did get homemade treats. Some of the "yuth," boys in particular, used the night for pranks. Some fairly harmless, some, shall we say, more ... involved. This might have ranged from tying tin cans on the back of cars as they were stopped at a stoplight, to adorning a rooftop with a farm implement. Adventures for the real risk takers may have run the gamut from knocking over a row of mailboxes to full out outhouse tipping. I expect if outhouses were still in numerous supply today, there are a few communities who'd scarce have one standing by the dawn's early light.

Father mentioned how many of the halloween customs, such as the jack-o-lantern derived from the Irish immigrants. Upon further questions after Mass regards his intimate association with pranks, he allowed that he had fallen in with a gang of "yuth" or two in the past. Further queries boxed him into taking the fifth amendment. I think at this remove he is safe from being put in juvenile hall.

Father gave a fine sermon on All Saints, and All Souls. He particularly wanted us to remember that we shouldn't associate purgatory with hopelessness, but that it was actually a very hopeful place, because it gave us a chance to cleanse ourselves before heaven.