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Monday, August 4, 2008

Mom and Me


Today would have been my mother's 78th birthday. She died on Aug. 8, 1995. She was a wonderful mother, and I adored her. I'm not going to say we didn't have our mother/daughter fights, because we did. [Like Bill Cosby's mom, my mother was also an expert on pigsties. Because she told me that I'd had the "worst pigsty I've ever seen."]

I always appreciated the fact that she was always there for me, emotionally, intellectually, and physically. She came from a poor family (not uncommon in the depression years she grew up in) but she was always rich in love. She supported me in everything I did and never tried to box me in as some mothers did in the 50s and 60s with daughters. She never said things like "Girls don't do X, girls don't do Y." She always said "If you think it will be fun, just do it." I didn't fully appreciate this until I was older.

Given the time frame my parents grew up in, a good education was hard to come by and neither graduated high school, much less college. But they always provided me with all the books I wanted and made sure I got the intellectual stimulation I needed and I was provided with all the education I wanted. I was the first girl, either side of the family to graduate from college. [Though granted I am blessed with far more male 1st cousins than female.]

My mother hated petty gossip and was not what you would call particularly a "joiner" though she did have her friends. She always kept busy with raising me and looking after my dad and she did the bill paying, gardening, most of the housework, and a lot of the home maintenance work (dad had the "two left thumbs" gene but mom got her dad's "golden hands.") She was a great cook - nothing "fancy" but she made all the beloved ethnic foods of my heritage (Easter was always our favorite time of the year, and Christmas a distant 2nd.) How wonderful to come home from school at lunchtime and have a nice hot vegetable soup and a toasted cheese sandwich. You could taste the love that went into it. When I was small I was the recipient of many handmade dresses and skirts. She also drove my lazy carcass to school when I didn't get up in time to catch the school bus. We loved to travel together.

She was usually a daily Mass goer, and the best thing she ever did for me was pass on her faith. My dearest memories of her were going to Benedictions and prayer hours with her when I was growing up, and her listening to my prayers at night.

There is not a day that goes by that I don't miss her. The above photo was the one my dad carried in his wallet until the day he died.

14 comments:

Adrienne said...

I think you and I had the same Mom. I miss mine, too!

The Digital Hairshirt said...

Aw, Karen, you lost your Ma in the same year I lost my Dad.

What a lovely lady she is! Her class and honor is verified by the wonderful tribute you gave her. Today, one must know that she looks down upon you, proudly.

Rob said...

Beautiful tribute. 26 years for me ten days ago. My Mom taught CCD for over 35 years. It must have been a pretty good example. I start my 38th year this fall. I only hope I can be half as good an example to my kids as my my parents were to me.

Sanctus Belle said...

Your mother is beautiful. You can almost hear her laugh...

gemoftheocean said...

Thanks to all for the comments.

X said...

Pass the Kleenex!

gemoftheocean said...

rjw, you've been teaching ccd for nearly 40 years? Well done!

Kirk said...

I just read this wonderful blog post. What a lovely tribute to your mother.

swissmiss said...

Very nice tribute, but you're scaring me again...we both posted about our moms! Same china pattern and now this ;-}

May your mother rest in peace and be preparing a wonderful place for you along side her in Heaven.

gemoftheocean said...

Kirk, welcome and thank you for stopping by.

Swiss: And we're about to be Zombie Bishops too!!! Soooo exciting.

Anonymous said...

She sounds so delightful. The best part about your mom was passing on the faith--you are truly amazingly blessed!

EC Gefroh said...

What a wonderful mother Karen. You were truly blessed to have her.

Jackie Parkes MJ said...

Beautiful picture...what lovely memories..

Anonymous said...

I'm so glad your mother handed on the faith to you and was such a good example of practicing a life of faith (or i might never have gotten to know you!). Eternal rest grant unto your dear mother....and oh...i do hope there's good home cooking in Heaven....

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