Not original by me, but I spotted it on the internet:
"The teleprompter is to help Bambi with his abc’s presentation. A is for affirmative-action. B is for Blame Bush. C is for Communism. D is for dictator. E is for entitlement. F is really B-plus. G is for Geithner. H is for hustler. I is for me, me, me. J is for jiving ya. K is for Kenyan. L is for lame duck. M is for madrassas. N is for what I can say (but you can’t). O is for me, me, me. P is for poseur. Q is for quota. R is for race card. S is for Sasquatch. T is for teleprompter. U inherit my wild spending. V is for vacation, vacation,vacation. W is my scapegoat. X is Tiger’s private life. Y am I still president? Z is for zip, zerO-bama. ?? Now you know your ABC’s… riding Scare Force One sure beats doing work to me. "
Zippy used a teleprompter today to speak to a group of grade school kids. Apparently it's the only place where a captive audience can get detention for not booing him.]